Your Doula Training Meant Well. Loss Asks for More.
This blog explores three common beliefs that many professionals in the perinatal space hold as they navigate supporting loss families: 1) Time heals, 2) I’ll just follow the family’s lead, and 3) Don’t bring it up. It might make it worse. Vallen unpacks each of these beliefs and then shares alternatives for care professionals to use in their work with grief and loss.
The Part of Grief No Calendar Prepares You For
This blog helps readers understand how to show up for pregnancy and infant loss families in the off-times. Many people check in around holidays and the baby’s birthday, but Vallen reminds us that the off-the-cuff texts and check-ins can also be so supportive for families.
What to Say to Someone After Pregnancy or Infant Loss
Grief does not follow a schedule. It does not move in neat stages, and it does not end because enough time has passed. After pregnancy or infant loss, grief lives in the body, the heart, and the identity of a parent. Research shows there is no evidence-based timeline for grief—and that pressure to “move on” can actually increase suffering. In this piece, we explore what grief really looks like, why it isn’t linear, and how healing happens not through forgetting, but through integration, support, and compassion.
The Silent Struggle – Unmasking the Realities of Perinatal Loss
Perinatal loss—whether through miscarriage, stillbirth, or neonatal death—is something we don’t talk about enough. Yes, it’s gaining more awareness, thanks to incredible nonprofits and families doing amazing work, but silence still lingers around this kind of loss.
And that silence? It doesn’t ease pain; it deepens it. Society often expects grieving parents to move on quickly, but how do we move on from losing a piece of our hearts? From losing a whole future we envisioned for months? If you're into mindset work, you know how powerful visualization is—we create these lives in our minds, and when they’re taken from us, it leaves a massive hole.
So today, let’s break the silence.